Along with feelings like happiness, anger, and fear, sadness is one of the most basic emotions we feel throughout our lives.

While it’s normal, common, and even necessary, sadness can be incredibly tough to deal with. Unlike happiness, which is associated with reward, sadness is often associated with loss—a difficult experience people often try to push away rather than feel.

What does sadness feel like?

Sadness can involve many other emotions, including grief, sorrow, regret, disappointment, and loneliness. The overarching theme of these feelings is that something important has been lost—whether it was real (a relationship, a loved one, good health) or imagined (a dream, an opportunity).

Emotional effects

Sadness can make you feel:

• Overwhelmed
• Unable to focus or concentrate
• Disconnected from people and things you care about
• Guilty, worthless, or ashamed
• Helpless or powerless
• As if things are in disarray

In many cases, sadness can trigger other emotions like anger or frustration. For instance, sadness over losing a job might turn into anger toward your former employer, or frustration with the job market.

Another secondary emotion sadness can trigger is anxiety. People may worry about the future, ruminate on what could have been, or dwell on the past.

Physical signs

Like other emotions, sadness can also cause physical responses. When someone is sad, they may:

• Droop or slump
• Have trouble expressing themselves
• Be tearful
• Feel tense
• Get an upset stomach or headache
• Feel a sinking sensation
• Lack energy or be fatigued
• Eat more or less than usual
• Have problems with sleep

Many of these emotional and physical signs of sadness are also symptoms of depression, a serious mental health condition that requires professional treatment. If your sadness isn’t subsiding or is making it hard to function, please seek help from a mental health professional.

If you’re in crisis, help is available now: Call or text the free, confidential 988 Lifeline at 988 or text HOME to 741741 to reach the Crisis Text Line. Both resources are available 24/7.

Why we feel sad

Sadness and even low levels of depression are adaptive emotions that can serve a purpose,  encouraging us to make up for a loss or work toward healing.¹

Attachment (the emotional bonds you form with others) can often be a source of sadness. These bonds and connections help give life meaning, joy, and purpose, which is why losses involving them can be so hard.

Some of the most common ways people experience loss include:

• Grief: You may grieve the loss of a loved person, animal companion, or relationship.
• Transitions: Even positive changes like starting a new job or becoming a parent can involve loss.
• Loss of control: Getting sick, having financial troubles, or going through a divorce can make a person feel like they have less agency.
• Loss of self-esteem: Receiving criticism, experiencing rejection, or not meeting a goal can lower your confidence in your own worth.
• Unfulfilled expectations: When something meaningful you hoped for doesn’t come to pass, it’s a kind of loss.

There are many other reasons why you might feel sad in addition to the above. Stress, trauma, isolation, relationship conflict, substance abuse, chronic pain, generational trauma, bad news, and many other factors can all play a role in how we feel.

How sadness can help

The sadness you feel may be unpleasant and even feel unbearable at times, but it can also serve an important purpose. Depending on how you’re able to cope with it, sadness can offer benefits including:

Education, perspective, and growth. Experiencing and acknowledging difficult emotions can help you learn more about who you are, what you really think and feel, and what you care most about. Difficult feelings can also offer an opportunity to learn to deal with emotions in healthy ways—for instance, learning to be present in the moment without judgment.

Motivation. Sadness can be a powerful motivator. It can push you to make positive changes, find new meaning, and appreciate the good parts of life.

Empathy and connection. Sadness can prompt you to reach out to others, whether they’re loved ones or totally new acquaintances. Sadness can also help you gain understanding and sympathy for people going through their own difficult experiences. That understanding can make it easier to connect and offer support.

Release and healing. Expressing sadness and other emotions you may have been bottling up can be a relief. It can also help you start the healing process.

Physical health benefits. It’s normal to feel a complicated mix of positive and negative emotions, and some research suggests that engaging with this mix of feelings is linked to better physical health.²

How to cope with sadness

Sadness often passes naturally, but there are some things you can do to care for yourself and cope in a healthy way.

Allow yourself to feel sad. Acknowledging and accepting your sadness without judgment can help you move through it more quickly.

Practice self-compassion. Try to treat yourself with the same kindness you would offer to someone else.

Talk to people. It can help to open up with trusted friends or family members who can offer understanding, support, or encouragement.

Connect regularly. If you’re feeling lonely or isolated, seek out or set up regular opportunities to interact with others. Even short, friendly interactions with strangers can be a helpful part of your day.³

Get outside. Spending time in nature can make you feel less stressed and more connected to the world.

Get moving. Physical activity can boost your mood and energy. Even a short walk around the block can make a difference.

Write down your thoughts and feelings. Putting your thoughts into words can help you express what you’re feeling, make sense of your emotions, and develop a plan for moving forward.

Express yourself creatively. Activities like painting, drawing, writing, or playing music are excellent ways to release emotions.

Make time for relaxation. Techniques like meditation, stretching, or deep breathing can help calm your mind and body.

Set healthy boundaries. Establishing respectful parameters in your relationships and around your time, energy, and preferences can help your happiness by reducing stress and conflict.

Do something you love. Hobbies or activities you enjoy can be satisfying distractions as well as a source of pleasure.

Help others. Doing something nice for someone else can have a wide range of physical and mental health benefits. It can also shift your focus from yourself and help you feel connected and appreciated.

Find things to be grateful for. Focusing on the good things in your life while still acknowledging the sadness you feel can balance your perspective and make difficult emotions easier to bear.

Be patient. It’s important to remember that sadness doesn’t last forever and that you will eventually feel better.

Seek professional help if needed. Sadness may be a normal emotion, but that doesn’t mean you have to deal with it on your own. If you’re struggling, a therapist or counselor can offer help and support. Visit our directory to find a therapist today.